Rituals are defined as a combination of gestures, symbols and language. While gestures and symbols have their own meaning, language helps to clarify and define the actions of a ritual. In modern day USA rituals are noted but not always fully examined and deemed as rituals. More specifically, the African American community houses many ritualistic activities that are not always noticeable to the unsuspecting eye. Cooking dinner and learning to cook are ritualistic rites of passage for women in African American families. The symbolism of wearing one’s first apron is significant and key values of love, nourishment, and womanly virtue can be assessed from the ritual of cooking.
When a young girl experiences her first menstrual cycle, that in itself is deemed as a right of passage into womanhood. The first instance of a menstrual cycle only partially starts womanhood for a young lady in an African American community. The other instance molding her into a full woman is the first cooking lesson initiated by a mother or grandmother. The teacher is almost always a member from the matriarchal family. Almost immediately following the first menstrual cycle is the infamous cooking lesson.
A young lady is soon invited into the kitchen of her mother or grandmother. She is instructed to wash her hands and is given an apron bought by the instructor. She starts off with learning how to prep the food by washing it. The first meal a young lady is taught to prepare differs between families, however, it usually consists of fried meat. In this process a young lady does not only acquire knowledge about cooking, she is also taught the convictions of a wife, mother, and nurturer. She is taught the virtue of a woman, modesty, duties, and what it means to be a good woman, wife, and mother.
The ritual of cooking reflects key values of women being the nurturers of a family. It is also the main instance that I, like many other women, express my love for my family. The apron’s symbolism depicts the transition of a young lady to a woman. Just as a child transitions from wearing socks to shoes. The initial cooking lesson creates lasting social bonds to the teacher of the lesson. If questions shall arise about womanly virtue, cooking, and wifely convictions, it is first nature to call upon one’s cooking teacher.
Cooking does not hinder a young lady to continue to live and experience life at the age they experience menstruation, it simply provides a guide to their new status change. The home is considered a place where the family thrives, expands, and forms social connections. Knowing how to cook and cooking contribute elements to the home that are important in African American communities.
As I experienced these same rites of passage making me into the woman that I am today, I am grateful for this ritual. I come home and cook dinner daily while reflecting on why I am cooking. Cooking is simple but complex at the same time due to its underlying meanings. The cooking woman determines the nourishment of the family, stability of a family, and sense of love.
